Why We Waited to Teach Our Black Sons About Slavery
My husband and I were both history majors so it was expected that our kids would come out of the womb knowing Black history.
In many ways, that has been true but some of the stories that people may have expected our kids to know at really young ages, we’ve waited to share with them. In this post, I am going to share why and what we are doing now.
As you read our perspective remember that every family does what works for them. If you shared with your children earlier or later, know that this is a judgment-free zone and I support you as we all try our best on this journey!
Why We Waited
To be honest, back in 2015, and 2016, I was really burned out. After Trayvon Martin, Eric Garner, and Black murder after Black murder, I, like many other Black people, was exhausted.
The reality that our sweet boy who was blessed with the gift of Blackness but would live in a world where Blackness is treated as a burden really made me stop and ask, “What’s important for this sweet brown boy to know?”
We decided to first focus on his belovedness as a black boy. We simply wanted him to know that he is loved and that he is worthy of love.
We did this in many ways. We intentionally read books and watched shows with Black characters in them. We learned about Black astronauts and inventors, both topics that were important to him. We also made observations about the world, admired his brown skin, and noted out loud when books didn’t include characters that looked like us.
We knew from studying slavery and The Civil War in depth during college, that slavery is just one part of our people’s story and it’s a very heavy part. And we wanted him to be so firm and clear in his belovedness that once he learns about the atrocities of slavery that he easily sees that the oppression of Black bodies had nothing to do with their worthiness and everything to do with the self-centered of white oppressors.
How we’re teaching our Black sons about Slavery
He is six going on seven now, and with this foundation solidly laid, I’m actually excited in a way that I didn’t think I would be to talk about slavery. We are using Juneteenth as an opportunity to celebrate Black resilience and resistance in the midst of hardship. The social studies teacher in me is shining bright and we’ve got sixteen picture books lined up that tell the larger story of the way Black folks have always pursued and paved the way for freedom.
Our Juneteenth Unit Study
I’ve had a few friends ask me recently about how we navigate this, so I’ve created a Juneteenth Reading and Activity Guide. It includes 16 book recommendations, over 70 questions and activities, and detailed parents’ notes on how to answer questions about slavery and race.
My goal was to make it simple for your family to talk about slavery and Juneteenth together. I’ve included small things that I think will make a big difference like the letter for you to sign and read to your kids.
What We’re Reading for Juneteenth
Juneteenth felt like the perfect opportunity to teach about slavery in the context of Black resilience because our ancestors paved the way for their own freedom through everyday acts of resistance.
With this guide, it is my hope that together, we: 1) celebrate the ways in which our ancestors paved the way for their own legal freedom; 2) honor the ways in which our ancestors resisted and overcame the institution of slavery; and 3) share in the joyful memory of our ancestors learning of their legal emancipation.
You can see all the books we’re reading by visiting Bookshop here.
It’s a tall order, but I think these 59 pages really do help tell the story of slavery in a way that is honoring to enslaved peoples and appropriate for young children.
It was sweet to think of my own two boys as I created this. There are questions to go along with each reading and lots of hands-on activities that will generally work for all elementary-aged students and can be appropriate through middle school, too.
The guide will normally be $29.99 but is on sale for $18.65 in anticipation of Juneteenth. You can grab yours here.
A few other things you want to know about the guide:
- It’s written for Black families and uses terms like “our” and “we” in this vein.
- You’ll be able to reflect on each reading with the questions provided.
- There are hands-on activities to really help our kids engage with the content.
- A welcome letter helps you set the stage for this conversation with your kids.
- Books a grouped by theme and there are notes to help you pace and reflect on what you’re reading.
- It’s designed for K-5 but can be used through middle school. Some vocabulary will be challenging for younger readers.
- These are all picture books grounded in historical fact.
What we’re doing in the future
We have a second sweet boy who will turn 3 this year. I imagine that with him we will introduce this topic around 5. This is mainly because many schools introduce slavery in Kindergarten, and although we homeschool, little friends are always sharing new learnings and we want to be sure that he learns about this topic in the safety of home first. Now that this guide is already created, I’m sure we’ll return to it for years to come.
Happy Juneteenth!
You can grab your Juneteenth Reading & Activity Guide here.
You can see all the books we’re reading here.
P.S: When did you learn about slavery as a child? How did it impact you? When did you teach your kids?
June 5, 2022 at 10:41 pm
O habe little memory of learning about black history and slavery outside of watching Roots in high school. The majority of what I now know about our history has been gained through del study, Youtube, seeking out classes in my community, and reading books written by black historians. We take an ask and tell approach to most topics. If the child asks about a topic we answer them in a way that is honest and age appropriate.
June 6, 2022 at 3:35 pm
The subject of slavery does not come up often in our household, however African history and geography does. Africa, and Africans, have a wealth of natural resources, from gold and copper to high melanin and the pineal gland. What’s important for young black children to know is what caused slavery, which was Caucasians desperation for abundance. What perpetuated slavery was addictions to sugar, tobacco, alcohol, fashion, sex and power, or legal systems that impact people such as language and culture. What made it possible was weapons of mass destruction. The trauma blacks have experienced goes without saying, however what’s incredible is how despite the attempts to be wiped out from existence, we’re still here. Between an African pedagogy and our family lineage, we’re able to have fruitful discussions that are personal and meaningful. Juneteenth, while significant, implies that Africans in the U.S. were granted freedom whereas the Maroon Wars, and their lack of popular knowledge, indicates how some Africans could not wait nor tolerate a hostage situation.
June 14, 2022 at 4:15 am
I remember watching Roots and the Color Purple in class around the 5th and 6th grades, but I was fortunate enough to have predominantly black teachers until high-school. My school had big Black history celebrations and heavy on MLK and the typical people where normally taught about. However, my mothers friend was a history major and work for Rand McNally (I believe?) and I used to get all kinds of books and maps from her. I always wondered why we focused on slavery and Jim Crow. I decided to teach my 8th grader about World civilizations throughout time and reprogram him from the whitewashed versions he has been taught in school.
5 Comments
I remember being taught about slavery in high school very vividly because it had such a strong and negative impact on my desire to learn. In middle school, I had been a high achiever and loved learning. I am sure that my middle school history teacher taught about slavery but he was such a proud, deep-voiced and majestic black man that my spirit had not been crushed but rather watered in his class. However, in high school, the topic of slavery and the pictures and words in the textbook seemed to reduce African Americans and Africans to citizens of a dark pit; enslaved, impoverished, and underachieving. Because I’d never had the shock of such pictures and words in the bosom of a safe black classroom (or safe and understanding white), everything was a horrendous stab in my gut. The high school teacher, by the way, was actually a wonderful person but she was insensitive and so was the textbook which painted a picture exactly how many white publishers and writers felt about blacks. All of that said…Juneteenth seems to an amazing way guide a child to a healthy, complete and truthful handle on American slavery and slavery as a whole.
my typo **to be an amazing**